


Crossed Lines

by blueswan



Category: Angel: the Series
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-08-26
Updated: 2004-08-26
Packaged: 2017-11-04 13:41:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 567
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/394513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueswan/pseuds/blueswan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Post Timebomb, Gunn figures out a way back to himself.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Crossed Lines

At night he hangs out in Wes' office looking at the books piled high. Not touching because at his best Wesley is anal about anything being moved. Now that Wes cultivates his own brand of crazy… Gunn isn't going there. Well, not yet anyway - Charles picks thing up quickly, it usually doesn't take more than a stabbing for him to take a hint.

If asked why he came to this place, he'd say he didn't know. That would be a lie. He comes here, because it's with the books and paper that he feels closest to what they once had. He can close his eyes, and imagine them all together - the smells of take-out nearly drowning their scents. Wes wearing that cologne Gunn knows no good girl would have given him - makes him smell like an invitation to sex. Or that could be his imagination. Angel with his uniquely Angelic smell - sharp, dry and whipped by copper. And Fred there with them smelling of innocence and a promise of sweetest sin. (What had he done?)

If he could get Wesley and Angel out in the dark to kill some vamps that would be better. But they don't have time anymore for the little things. Gunn snorts and tosses a paperweight up and down. Little things like children as appetizers, parents eating their families. Yeah, things are heating up in the old neighbourhood. Gunn's been checking, then appealing to Angel, but the priorities have changed somehow.

Well, he knows why they changed and how - even understands Angel's viewpoint. Logic and seeing the bigger picture that's what Angel talks about now. They've all crossed a line and their failures are stacking up like cords of wood.

No, his failure surpasses everything the others have done - has directly killed one of their own. He might as well have held a Gunn to Fred, and pulled the trigger. Winces, and wonders if he didn't do just that back with that professor he killed for her. That murder had lain between them until there was no more room in their bed for the three. And no more room in their hearts either. There is no going back and no regret for that though. Gunn feels a link newly forged uniting him with both Angel and Wes.

He is afraid that his is a tie that is going to hold him forever. Bind him to the wolf, the ram and the hart more that it will to the group, and the mission. It's guilt - gut wrenching soul tugging guilt - pain that will never end, and horror that he could sink so low. He understands Angel, the soul-driven mass murderer, in this one moment. And Wes, who had screwed his way to never-ending guilt over the lawyer bitch.

They are - all three - doomed. There is no getting away from it. He was willing even before Angel signed them up. He'd wanted all this and not once questioned the cost. His soul already bargained away once, he knows that he has little chance to seek redemption. Now is that time.

Gunn bangs the chair down onto four legs and stands slowly, then carefully picks his way out of the office. Hits the hall running. Charles Gunn was once hired muscle, but before that ever happened he had a crew. He had a mission. It's time to go home again - see how long he can escape.


End file.
